I thought once I woke up I’d feel better but I was wrong I’m still coughing up shit and my neck hurts so bad ugh at least my heads not hurting yet.
[breaks down your door at 3 in the morning] do you wanna build a snowman?
Maybe we wouldn’t sound so bad if some people didn’t try to play with big meaty claws.
i’m a lame adult so far all i’ve done is sleep and get picked up from school by my mom
IM SO FUCKING SORRY
i t d o e s n ‘t h a v e t o b e a h u m a n
YOU’RE MAKING IT WORSE DAMMIT
Hello, Police? I accidentally stepped on my cats foot and need to be arrested
Bulbasaur is such a sweetie, seriously.
#SERIOUSLY #ASH’S BULBASAUR IS ONE OF THE COOLEST POKEMON IN TERMS OF PERSONALITY #HE ROCKS TOGEPI TO SLEEP WHEN IT’S CRYING #IT PROTECTED AND LOOKED AFTER OTHER POKEMON BEFORE ASH CAUGHT IT #IT ACTUALLY SAW RIGHT THROUGH ONE OF TEAM ROCKET’S DISGUISES AND DECIDED TO FUCK THEIR SHIT UP FOR TRYING TO STEAL POKEMON #in other words: bulbasaur is a kind and caring pokemon who looks out for others and will fuck you up if you try to hurt it’s friends
pikachu and squirtle just look so fucking impressed they’re like
DUDE HE WAS SAD AND NOW HE’S NOT SAD
YOU UNSADDED HIM
DUDE I THINK YOU MIGHT BE MAGIC”
Someone stuck a plunger on the back of a chicken FOR SCIENCE.
How do I get that job? Why was that career path never laid out for me when I was in middle school?
yea dude I drink a lot. Drink at parties all the time. yea you heard right, 9 capri suns. 9. in 45 minuets.